Issues with Sleeping
So I’m not sure what’s going on but lately (the last three days) I have found it impossible to fall a sleep at a decent hour. Granted the usual decent hour for me is around 12:30/1 am but lately it’s been 3/4/5 even. And then waking up for classes at 8. Last night I had a great talk with Noland online at round 3-4 which made me start thinking about why I may not be sleeping. And frankly there are several things that might play into it.One ever since Sarah and I haven’t been friends I have been rethinking how I have treated people in the past and how I made judgements about things I bought or gone to do, and in all honesty some of them in hindsight were not the best decisions. But that’s the thing about hindsight site isn’t it? You don’t know until after. Like Noland pointed out those "maybe" bad choices were mine to make and Sarah and I, when we were friends, always had fun together and they were good times. I can’t forget that... maybe that’s why I’m not really bitter... well maybe a little.
The other thing that could explain sleep loss is the fact that I have been sick for about the last week and a half and I am finally getting over the sucky-ness. And during that time I slept all the time, was drugged up, and was lazy beyond belief. So now is my energy finally catching up with me? Since I was so used to little sleep is my sleep timer on overload? Who knows... I just know I want to sleep!
And last but certainly not least the problem/situation that I have yet to really deal with, because I have been sick. My brother, my only brother, the guy I am closest to in my life (sorry Scott) is moving even further away than he does not. He has just gotten a great job out in California and is moving out there ASAP. I am not kidding! He got the offer Monday and they are moving out there before Nov. 1st!!! Where is my adjustment period?! My chance to visit him tons before he flies across the country? The other thing as that now he and his fiancee are going to do a sort of shotgun wedding... not in the sense that she’s knocked up but the fact that they are going to get married before they leave. Talk about stressful! And you know then I think about how I feel and then think about what they are going through or my mom... she’s hiding it well, but how long can that last. I have a feeling it’s all over at the wedding. Everyone will be crying for one reason or another. And I am so sick pf people being like "well think of it this way, you have a great reason to go on vacation to California" Anyone who has had family move far away knows that, that’s bullshit. I am still trying to save money, unsuccessfully, to visit Noland, or my friends Scott and Julie, and they’ve all been gone for at least a year! But like everything in our lives God only gives you as much as you can handle, right? Well this time he’s getting pretty close to the breaking point.
So that it. The hidden monster that is stopping the sandman from coming to visit.
PS this is most likely the longest blog I will ever right. I haven’t the time! ;o)
posted by lovelylisa23 @ 3:07 PM
3 Comments:
I don't know how to put links on your blog or anything fun like that. I made Amanda do it for me. Sorry you aren't sleeping well. I actually couldn't sleep for about a week after I was sick, and then got back on schedule.
Sister girlfriend - my brother lives in CA, and it's lame - I don't even see him once a year. However, with that said, if Rob's got such a good job, maybe he'll be able to buy you a plane ticket to go visit him, and believe me, "visiting family" is THE best excuse to visit fun places! Maybe next he'll get a job offer in Jamaica...
Jamacia would be fun. And I'm not going to lie I will love visiting. but my bro and i are like this II ... (I talk to much with my hands) But i am getting very excited to see them cause they are getting married TOMORROW!! yeah!
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